Shine on

The future is starting to look promising for bicycle repairmen and diesel generator manufacturers. Now that companies are demanding their workers return to the office and get back to running the roads polluting the air, increasing the amount of daily highway carnage, an opportunity arises. We can push employees into fossil fuel alternatives and take credit for battling the global warming conundrum.

Get a bike and start peddling your way to work. We may even have a surplus of bicycles discover-able by Google maps that we can leverage. Yes walking may be a practical option for some, but the big disruption is sure to be electric vehicles. What better incentive to continue to go to work than to have a very large financial purchase to pay for? This might actually become as burdensome as paying off a student loan. Never has there been a better incentive to work other than possibly putting food on the table for a family you may be somewhat responsible for.

Every night after the sun goes down and the wind stops blowing millions of electric vehicles will get plugged in to recharge the batteries drained from the day’s short distance commute. If for some unknown reason should there be any kind of disruption to the availability of electricity you’ll appreciate the brand new fossil fuel generator you have all primed and ready for service to recharge that green machine you have sitting in the driveway. You’ll beam with pride knowing you’re doing your part to show that you care about Global Warming as you peddle over to the nearest fresh fried grasshopper stand for a tasty meal.

Cancel all your Zoom and Teams calls from here on out and embrace the future of designer masks and illuminated Plexiglas dividers. Yeah, you got this. If you do have the unfortunate experience of something like a flat bicycle tire or you just haven’t got the energy to walk back home, maybe you can call someone who knows someone who still has an old gas powered pick up that can come to your rescue.

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